How To Get Ex Back – 4 Ways And 4 Myths

by admin on July 16, 2013

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How To Get Ex Back – 4 Ways And 4 Myths


The problem with ex’s is that you can’t easily get them out of your mind or even your heart for that matter. But some people have distorted (or perhaps unusual) views about getting back with their ex’s. Others might just kick them to the kerb and are not willing to give their partners a second chance. And there are some people who have a weird feeling about spending more time with somebody who had once broke their hearts.

I have researched tons and tons of content about how to get ex back after a serious breakup, and believe me, most of these so-called “tips” are all hokum. These “experts” believe that their advice applies to ALL relationships – that if you do this or not do that, you will be guaranteed a second chance with your girl. I, however, know that the complexity of all relationships does not allow for that – there is no definite set of rules that will get you out of your predicament. So, how are you supposed get this kind of a person back?

Here are some effective ways on how to get your ex back no matter how stubborn he or she might be:


1. Appeal to the heart

Let your heart speak directly to his heart. Sometimes, you don’t need words to tell anybody how much you love them. You can communicate it and they would feel it somehow. Your ex certainly would if they were ever in tune with you at all during your relationship. This is a trick that can be a little too hard to master. But with your ex partner, you’ll know how to do it in a way.


2. Avoid all the lies

Lies have no place in a relationship. So be sure when you open your mouth to speak, there will be only truth in your words. Tell your ex exactly how you feel. Doing so may make not always make you look good but it’s a card that’s worth playing if you want any future relationship to be on a firm and solid footing.


3. Don’t give yourself false hopes

Nobody said that it is easy to revive a past relationship. Even the best-selling books on how to get your ex back can’t give you a 100% guarantee that their tips would work for a particular set of circumstances. A lot of it will depend on how much your ex really loves you and how much sacrifice and forgiveness you’re willing to make.


4. Look for the signs

You’ll know if your ex still loves you if you catch him or her looking at you in that old way that they used to, although they won’t be quick to admit it. He still cares if he is concerned about your usual affairs and goings on. Furthermore, he still loves you if he hates you. After all, you can’t hate somebody you don’t have any feeling towards with, can you?
Of course, there are some things you need to change about your attitude so that you will strengthen your case in front of your ex-girlfriend. She dumped you; therefore, there is something that she was dissatisfied about in the relationship. You’re going to need to change that.


how to get ex back

I can’t figure these flaws out for you because I don’t have an idea of what your previous relationship was like, but I can disclose to you five of the most common myths about breakups that a lot of people consider to be true but are actually with no basis.

Myth #1: You Should Never Contact Your Ex After Breakup

This is just the most childish “advice” I’ve heard about relationships. Of course, there are instances where it is inappropriate and forbidden to contact an ex after a breakup, but to NEVER contact them? As in, an eternal ban of communication from your ex-partner? This can’t be farther from the truth. What if your ex tries to contact your first? What if it’s been over a month since the break up? What if you are both working at the same place and you need to be able to talk to each other? Does this advice still hold?

Maybe the more appropriate tip would be “If possible, limit your communication with your ex, and sensibly ask your ex to do the same.” And this situation shouldn’t go on for more than a month. Trust me, relationship heartaches normally cease three weeks after a breakup. So, I think it’s safe to talk to your ex freely and openly after three weeks. But never before that.

Myth #2: You Shouldn’t Be Sad About The Situation

Of course you should be sad! You are not a robot; it’s okay to be depressed because of a breakup. We are talking about real emotions here, real memories wasted because of disagreements and irreconcilable differences. You should grieve about the breakup before you can finally truly get over it.

What is unacceptable, however, is making it obvious to your ex how sad you are. If you’re on the process of figuring out how to get your ex back, then you shouldn’t be showing weakness and desperation in front of your ex. You can grieve, but grieve silently. Be depressed discreetly. Open up to a few trusted friends about the situation, but not to everyone.


Myth 3: You Should Not Act Immediately To Get Your Ex Back

Did you know that almost all breakups involve a third party of some sort? It can be a very real possibility that your ex broke up with you because she already found someone else; she just didn’t want the hassle of being called a “whore” or a “slut” by being together with two men at the same time, so she broke up with you. Not acting immediately to retrieve your lost relationship will only reduce your chances to zero. So, really, don’t believe this hoopla about “being patient” or “giving it time”. You have to act as soon as you’ve broken up.

That is not to say that you won’t give your ex some space. You should, but only for a few days. When the dust has finally settled, try talking to her and telling her of your plan to get the relationship back. This will take her off guard and will stunt the possibility of her getting together with another guy.

Myth #4: Making Your Ex Jealous Is Effective In Getting Her Back

This is the biggest lie in the book in my opinion. We have mentioned already in the article that the main reason for breakups is a third party – if you let your ex-girlfriend see you seemingly happy on dates with someone else, then she will be convinced all the more that the breakup was for the better. She will then pursue her new relationship seeing that you’ve already moved on. So, in reality, this plan will backfire from the get go. Don’t make her jealous – instead, show how committed and loyal you are to the relationship by not seeing other people.


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